Living & Learning

So, I am learning that even when you try to do things right, things can still blow up in your face if you started out wrong. Well, I knew that, but sometimes we all forget the stuff we learned at a young age, or perhaps we just lose sight of the early life lessons (like how I said "we", right?). Real talk, things can blow up in your face even if you started out right with positive intentions. Life is just that way.

Which got me to thinking about how serious life is, and how important it is to be clear about what you want, expect,desire, etc. For example, I recall having a running disagreement with my mother about quitting my job as a teacher and finding another job that paid me more. Her primary concern was her son, while I was more focused on not quitting, not bailing out on my students (good or bad) like so many others had (justified or not), being a positive model of what a young black man could be, showing fortitude, standing my grand, etc. While these were all noble things, that decision to stay has greatly shaped everything I've encountered and done in my adult life post-graduation. From being unemployed to getting licensed in mortgage origination/life insurance sales...relationships, both platonic and otherwise.,..all have a root in that decision. Hell, I realized that I do belly ache a bit due to so much adversity, but that I am also a fighter and get shit done when my back is against the wall.

All that being said, my thinking is now, ore than ever, that I need to make better decisions from the outset. Truth be told, I haven't mde a lot of bad decisions, but I haven't taken a lot of risk either. So each day is a day I need to assess what risks and what decisions I am going to make/take for the day. I also feel, that all of these hardships are telling me I'm on the verge of a breakthrough.

There are certain things I believe I was meant to do, but without life kicking my ass and humbling me, I doubt I'd be able to do correctly. My decisions, and my ability to take the consequences and also assess my role (good, bad, or otherwise) in them has made me a better man. Hell, I'm nowhere near perfect, but I have a lot going on for myself. I may be broke financially, but I am rich in so many other ways, which let's me know I am blessed, and that I have a lot of responsibility when things start lining up for me.

----------------
Now playing: Alice Smith - Do I